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Know Chopsticks Etiquette When Chinese Dating by Achelle Vinzon
If you’re serious about Chinese dating and finding a Chinese wife, you must know that chopsticks etiquette is different for each country that makes use of these nifty eating utensils.  You must also be aware it was the Chinese that invented them, and the Japanese, Koreans, and Vietnamese simply followed suit.  When you’re new to China, you may feel very proud of and very confident about your chopsticks skills; just make sure you’re not confusing Japanese, Korean, Vietnamese, or even Taiwanese chopsticks etiquette with Chinese chopsticks etiquette.

Chopsticks were first used in ancient China and their use was promoted by the great Chinese philosopher, Confucius, as being characteristic of benevolence and gentleness – morals which Confucius held in high esteem.

Additionally, eating is a cultural thing all its own in China and Chinese food culture represents a major facet of the entire Chinese culture; a foreigner’s Chinese food experience won’t be authentic without chopsticks.  When you’re eating with your special Chinese lady, and, even more importantly, when you’re eating with her family, you should make sure you’re practicing the Chopsticks etiquette of China, and not that of another country!
Want Are you Chinese dating and want to impress the pants off of your new Chinese girlfriend? Learn to eat with chopsticks like a pro and you'll have her eating out of your hand.Chinese Chopsticks Etiquette:

- When eating rice, hold the rice bowl to your mouth and push the rice directly into your mouth using your chopsticks.
- Using your chopsticks to transfer food from the serving dishes or your plate to the plate of someone you are close to or closely related to, or of the elderly is acceptable and considered polite and respectful.
- Wait for the elders to pick up their chopsticks before you pick up yours.
- Do not pierce or stab food with your chopstick/s; use a spoon, instead, if the food is difficult to eat with chopsticks.
- When resting your chopsticks on the table/your plate, make sure they’re not pointing at anyone.
- Do not stick your chopsticks upright in a bowl of rice.
- Don’t tap your chopsticks on the edge of your bowl; this behavior is associated with beggars.
- When you’re just taking a break from eating, rest your chopsticks on the side of your bowl; when you’re done, rest them on top of the bowl.
Taiwanese Chopsticks Etiquette:

- Chopsticks can be used like a knife and fork to cut food into smaller portions for children.
- Food is shared by transferring it on a separate plate or directly onto the plate of the other person, but not from one pair of chopsticks to another.
- Chopsticks should be placed sideways across the rice bowl when not being used, on a chopstick rest, or flat on top of the bowl when you’re finished eating.
- You should not leave chopsticks sticking out of the rice bowl.
- You should not let the chopsticks linger in your mouth, nor should you bite them.
- Don’t dip your chopsticks into the soup bowl or use them to pick up contents from the soup bowl.

Japanese Chopsticks Etiquette:

- Food is transferred directly onto the recipient’s plate; transferring of food from one pair of chopsticks to another is poor etiquette.
- When communal/serving chopsticks are not provided, it is acceptable to use the other end of the chopsticks to transfer food from the serving plate.
- When not used, the chopsticks should be placed on a chopstick rest with the pointed ends resting on it directly; when a chopstick rest is available, the paper case that used to hold the chopsticks can be folded to make a substitute chopstick rest.
- Chopsticks should not be placed on the table in the shape of an “X” or a cross, or sticking up and out of the rice.
- When resting the chopsticks, the ends used for eating should be pointing to the left and the opposite end pointing to the right.
- In a formal setting, disposable chopsticks should be put back inside the wrapper after the meal.

Korean Chopsticks Etiquette:

- Chopsticks are often used with a spoon.
- The younger ones at the table wait for the elders to pick up their utensils before they do.
- When eating food that “drips,” a spoon is used with the chopsticks.  Bringing a bowl or dish to one’s mouth and pushing the food into the mouth with the chopsticks is considered rude; some noodle dishes are the exception.
- Chopsticks should not be placed to the left of the spoon when they are laid down on the table.
- Chopsticks and a spoon are not supposed to be held together in one hand.
- A spoon is used to eat rice, soup, stew, and liquid side dishes; chopsticks are used to eat solid side dishes. 

Not knowing these differences can either give your date (and her family) a source of amusement and/or lose you a lot of points.  On the other hand, knowing these differences can take you a long way when Chinese dating.  

From: Original         Author: Achelle Vinzon         Time: 8/30/2013 3:47:00 PM

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#2013-09-04 21:55:00 by melcyan @melcyan
Reply I love the diagram. It is exactly the way I use chopsticks but no one In my Chinese partner's family or their friends use chopsticks this way. They pivot both chopsticks rather than having one fixed.
#2013-09-10 11:54:00 by aussieghump @aussieghump
Reply Some other rules a Chinese friend shared with me...
- Don´t lie your chopsticks across the top of the bowl - reminds us of a past relative. (in rural areas, setting a table place for a recently deceased relative is still common, the chopsticks remain across the top of the bowl for the meal)

- Dont´t stand chopsticks upright in a bowl - reminds us of incense in a funeral procession.

- If you drop your chopstick on the floor, don´t pick it up until after the meal - bad luck.

- lie the chopstick on the holder or on the side of your plate, not on the table.

- don´t lick your chopstick, place it in your mouth, but no licking.

- the distance you hold your chopstick from the point is sometimes noted by old people - too close to the point means you are mean and stingy
#2013-09-12 20:41:00 by crystalshoe @crystalshoe
Reply Old people tell me see a woman how to use chopsticks...can find whether she will live with her future husband distance far or close of her parents’ home.
#2013-10-16 18:51:00 by Barry1 @Barry1
Reply No one - and I mean no one - will ever convince me that a pair of chopsticks is better in any way than a good ol' knife and fork to eat a meal.

Oh, maybe there is but one area chopsticks are superior in.... to use in the fire in the cold of winter to help heat up the room. :)

Whoever said Westerners were basically little more than culturally insensitive oafs who should all be sent packing back to their mother countries in disgrace was, well..... right!
#2013-11-01 22:56:00 by melcyan @melcyan
Reply I recently had a meal in a restaurant in a 5 star hotel in Shanghai. The chopstick rest had two pairs of chopsticks on it and a round metal spoon resting on the center of the rest. I was told the pair of chopsticks on the right were for taking food from the the center to my bowl and the pair of chopsticks on the left were for me to eat with. I like this idea but I have never encountered it before. Does anyone know about the history of this type of chopstick rest and how common it is?
#2014-11-30 09:32:00 by SydneyPaul @SydneyPaul
Reply @Barry1
No one will ever convince you a pair of chopsticks is better than a knife and obviously don't eat much Asian food, ever tried eating noodle soup with a knife and fork? it just doesn't work. I regularly use chopsticks when eating Asian food at home in Australia.

Their good to use in the fire to heat up the room... really? it's people like you their talking about when they call Westerners insensitive oafs, and to honest, in this case I agree with them.
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