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Looking to Marry a Chinese Girl? You’d Better Understand Confucius! by John Abbot
Without doubt, Confucius (552-479 BC) is the most influential person in Chinese history. Centuries later, his teachings continue to have a deep impact on Chinese society.  If you are skeptical about the influence of this ancient philosopher on modern Chinese society then let me remind you of the inaugural ceremony of the 2008 Beijing Olympics. Not only did the ceremony kick off with a quote of Confucius which meant “It is a great pleasure to have friends come to visit from far away”,  but over three thousand performers, dressed in the costumes of Confucius’ disciples, later paraded through the stadium.

Let’s get the facts straight that Confucianism is not a religion, at least not in the sense a westerner perceives a religion. It would be more correct to say that Confucius was a statesman and philosopher who lived during the chaotic times known as Spring and Autumn in Chinese History. Naturally, he addressed the biggest dilemma of his time - the best way to bring order to government and society. 

Confucius (the movie) scored well in China this year. If you can find a copy with English subtitles or you can understand Chinese it's well worth seeing.Confucianism is an amalgam of social and political ethics whose foundation lies in filial piety, kinship, faithfulness and rectitude. His teachings could be described as a sort of moral guide that tells how a gentleman should behave down to the last detail besides prescription for a good government.

In other words, it advocates principles of social and familial hierarchy, group orientation, and reverence for age and tradition that bring stability and harmony in the average daily life. Rather than an abstract principle of good and evil, Confucianism promotes practical morality.

Confucius believed that to maintain harmony people should understand their place in the society and behave according to their rank. In the system of interdependent relationships devised by Confucius, the lower echelons obey the higher right from the family level to the national level. Even today, Chinese revere authority and age.
Though modern Chinese don’t exactly stick to the narrowly defined roles by Confucianism, most of them still tend to think in terms of hierarchy and respect the differences in status much more than Westerners. The point that I want to make here is that Chinese respect the chain of command as opposed to westerners who tend to be more egalitarian and treat everybody as equals.

How does this matter to you, a western guy attracted to Chinese girls. Well, for instance, let’s just say you want to marry your Chinese girlfriend. You know, the one you have been dating online, and just recently spent some lovely real live time with. Well the bottom line is that it isn’t likely to happen without your first winning the approval of the elders in the family. Doing so is imperative as often their decision is final.  

You can put that extra hurdle to your lifelong married bliss with a beautiful Chinese girl down to Confucius, so don’t tell us that he didn’t have a pretty profound impact, not only on China but on the world. Not bad for a man who lived 2,500 years ago.


From: Original         Author: John Abbot         Time: 5/6/2012 4:31:27 PM

 
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#2012-05-07 03:47:00 by spinteron @spinteron
Reply IMPORTANT THE ARTICLE ABOUT CONFUCIUS, BUT IT IS POSSIBLE FOR A WESTERN MAN OF 70 YEARS OLDEL ASPIRE TO THE LOVE OF ONE CHINESSE GIRL OF 26 OR 32 YEARS OLDER? SHE WOULD BE RESPECT WHAT SHE LEARN OF CONFUCIUS TODAY? OR THERE DID CHANGE FOR BAD ACTUALLY? THANKS UOU FOR ANSWER
#2012-05-07 11:03:00 by doctorj @doctorj
Reply well said, john, but understanding confucian thought is just a beginning. i'd recommend any western man spend at least a year studying chinese history, art, poetry, politics, and of course language prior to planning a visit to the middle kingdom. if you do then your visit will pay very rich dividends indeed. it surely led to my finding and marrying a most lovely chinese lady.
#2012-06-17 13:40:00 by Io58 @Io58
Reply Very well written insight of confucian, am aware that the Chinese society is still a very closed one, despite their economic development. China has little wealth during the era of confician compare to today. What impart of the new developing economy have on confucian if any? China is experiencing more and more of western culture than ever before; there is much western influence in the country, America is the most society, chinese emulate today, because she created the most intellectual properties of the World. China wants, wants to know how America came about her advancement in all areas of human endeavours. Do you think this new way of thinking will not have an impact on confucian and the today Chinese people? It's a new age for Chinese people, their racial/thinking identity is going to change in due time.
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