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The Cast by JulesE

There are really only four women of interest and they all live in Guangdong Provice.  It just worked out that way.  I had been chatting with all of them for the last few weeks and I had different ideas about each of them.  Let me describe them.  First there is “Feisty.”  She is 32 years old, has a raspy voice and her photos look just a little bit slutty, but, in a very provocative way.  She does not work and lives with her mother.  When we began chatting she was very interested in improving her English.  We would spend hours on line and she was making progress.  Then for no apparent reason she became apathetic and our chat time diminished along with her drive.  She began providing excuses for not being able to communicate.  She was coming down with various aches and pains that required her to need more and more sleep.  She did not want to discontinue the relationship; she just wanted to put less effort into keeping it going.  She basically became lazy.  I realized that time was going by and I did not really know who she was.  Her time was short.

Like all dating sites CLM offers extensive matching
features, but deep down we think its more about the
mystical "spark" that happens between two people.

Cartoon by Doug Savage courtesy of

Next is “Earth Mother.”  She is 31 years old and began as just a friend.  She asked me for advice on how to approach western men and how western men feel about Chinese women.  I tried to explain that I was only able to tell her my version of what I expected from a woman and how I treat women.  She knew I was coming to Guangzhou and insisted that we meet for dinner.  The more I talked to her the more I liked her inquisitive nature.  After getting to know her better I began to think she may be more mature than I had anticipated and could be a viable candidate.  Then we began discussing her children.  The communication problem had led me to believe that she had only one daughter who was 11 years old and that she had been divorced from her husband for three years.   But, as communication became clearer the reality was that she had two other children.  Each child was from a different father and the youngest was only one year old.  Earth Mother did not believe in contraception and told me she wanted to have at least three more children.  I don’t know the laws of China that well, but, I had been under the impression that there was a one child limit.  Earth Mother was skirting the law.  She only had the 11 year daughter at home.  The others were with their fathers.  She was a very sexually active young lady who was somewhat reluctant to be upfront about the size of her family.  Our last conversations revolved around the need for her to go to a doctor and get checked for sexually transmitted diseases.

Then there is ‘Wild Child.”  She is 26 years old, a real knockout and spoke almost perfect English.  She is a master of American slang and a true party animal.  This beauty owned her own business and had two employees working for her.  She had been in business three years and was established enough to be able to stay out late every night of the week.  She was the only woman I chatted with in the afternoons.  We would usually talk around 02:00 PM CST.   That’s 03:00AM China time.  We spoke on the phone as much as online.   She was wild and fun to talk to.  I never told her I wanted to be anything but a friend.  She was good with that and we had many hours of hilarious conversations.  Then one day things changed.  She told me that she had quit talking to other men on CLM and was only talking to me.  I explained that she was way too young for me and that we had agreed to only be friends.  She said that she liked older men and was serious about settling down and getting married.  I questioned her honesty.  After all it was around four o’clock in the morning her time and she was a little drunk.  I explained the rule I had come up with to calculate when a woman was too young for a man.  It goes like this; if the age of the woman is less than the gap then she is too young.  In other words, if the man is 60 and the woman is 29, she is one year too young.  This rule isn’t based on anything scientific; it is just something I came up with to put some parameters on selection.   I am sure there are many happy couples who are outside my rule.  Anyway she was 26 and we were 31 years apart in age.  She was not happy with my rule.  After that afternoon I changed my profile to read married/attached and removed my pictures from the CLM site.  She never spoke to me again.  I was too close to being in China and had enough on my plate.

Last and certainly not least is the “Teacher”, a 43 year old beauty.  I had been chatting with this woman for only two and a half weeks before arriving in China.  She does not wear makeup and does not have glamour photos of windblown hair.  She looks and is very intelligent.  Her English is limited, but, she tries very hard and I noticed remarkable improvement over the few weeks of chatting.  I noticed that I had a smile on my face when I chatted with her and I seemed to be in a good mood the remaining part of each day.  I had sent this woman a message during the first few days after I had become a CLM member.  I remembered that she had been offline for over a month and I did not believe I would hear back from her.   Her face had haunted me from my initial search.   It is one of those faces you just can’t forget.   Rather hard to explain really, a part of me knew from the very beginning that she was special.  She is a single mother rearing a teenage son.  She is sophisticated, warm, sexy and honest.  Every time I finished chatting with her my imagination soared as I wondered what it would be like to meet her.  Yet I was still talking to other women at the same time.  But, by the time I had arrived in Guangzhou, my mind was made up.  I was only going to see the “Teacher.”

From: Original         Author: JulesE         Time: 3/5/2010 4:14:33 PM

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