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Western Misconceptions About Chinese Women by John Abbot

I have now lived in China for the better part of 5 years, and I’m constantly astounded by the broad misconceptions held by Westerners about China and Chinese Women.  Here a few of the major ones:

1.  All Chinese Are The Same.

We all know that Germans are not the same as Italians, French are not the same as the British, and Swedish are not the same as Spanish.  In America, no one thinks that Californians are the same as New Yorkers, or Texans the same as Minnesotans, but for some reason Westerners all assume that all 1.3 billion Chinese think, act and are the same. In truth there are 56 different specific cultures within China.  The Han do make up more than 90% of the total population, but even within the Han culture there are endless varieties of ways of thinking and acting.  Every Province, indeed every major city, has a distinct linguistic dialect and numerous cultural variations from all the others. 



“Along The Silk Road”

by Hua Long

Do you think all Chinese look the same?  This incredible painting depicts the Uigur peoples long ago, Moslem descendants of ancient Turks, who remain today one of the 56 cultural minorities, resident primarily in the Xinjiang Uigur Autonomous Region of Western China.

If you enter a relationship with someone from Urumqi, Xinjiang, then you’d better be asking yourself “What does a person from Urumqi think?”, not “What does a Chinese person think?”, or you may be sadly unprepared to understand your new mate.

2.  All Chinese Women Are The Same

Most cultures and most places in China are male dominated.  In many locations it’s not unusual at all to see the little Chinese gal (at least after the courting stage) trailing her husband by several feet, hauling suitcases and boxes that weigh more than her, while he strolls blithely along without a care in the world, ignoring her entirely.  But this is not universal, and the exceptions can be surprising.

Shanghainese women generally seem to dominate, and Chinese men from other places love to deride Shanghai men for being whipped by their women.  In fact, Shanghai men are probably the closest thing in China to us Westerners.  There is a cultural minority in Yunnan Province in Western China, the Muo Suo, which is totally female dominated.  The male can be kicked out of the home at anytime, and frequently is, with no rights whatsoever.  The female can have as many males as she chooses, and can discard them at will. 

And while China is generally still male dominated, that should not lead to the conclusion that Chinese women are all docile and subservient; far from it. If the male fulfils his role properly, and lives up to his obligations, he is the boss, but screw up and he can quickly find himself answering some hard and pointed questions from the “little woman”.

3.  All Chinese Women Want a Western Man

Nonsense!  Many Chinese women are interested in Western men, and for many reasons.  One is that we have been well trained by Western women to treat women well, and generally, we are more inclined to behave like Shanghainese men.  If you were a woman, wouldn’t you prefer that we carry the suitcases and heavy loads while you strolled casually ahead in a state of bliss, or even if we carry our share in fairness and equality?  Another reason is that on average we are perceived to have more money and a greater ability to provide financial security, and financial security is important to Chinese women (just as it is to Western women).

However, I would guess that there are far more Chinese women who are not interested in Western men than are.  But, even if only 20% are interested, that is roughly 125 million women, which is plenty to go around for Western men who are interested in them.  And while not all Chinese women are “great partner material”, for reasons that are revealed elsewhere on this website, I still like your chances of finding that great partner here among Chinese women far better than among Western women.  But try to avoid the misconceptions while you’re on your quest.

From: Original         Author: John Abbot         Time: 11/4/2012 1:14:11 PM

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#2012-05-21 20:12:00 by gaspasser @gaspasser
Reply Interesting and informative article...
#2012-06-11 00:08:00 by lincida @lincida
Reply very interesting , it seemed the author knew china very well.
#2012-09-24 05:46:00 by masonmike @masonmike
Reply Thanks. every bit of info on that subject is very useful.
#2012-11-10 03:38:00 by Anonymous165208 @Anonymous165208
Chinese woman why choose foreigner man ? Has many reasons because of foreign mans most of better than chinese mans.Its like of reasons is respect, love, romantic, care of body, not only money is important, feel relax, well education, well sexual activity, less stress from family, adventure soul, not must birth only one baby, can go another country and baby can speak two language advantage, another culture and lifestyle... and such like many reasons of this.But its comics things of Chinese man still thinking only money can do all of things and money is enough for married.
#2014-01-16 05:41:00 by IluvBruceLee @IluvBruceLee
Reply This is true I like the fact that Chinese women have their on minds it adds to their desirableness. They all look different they all act different and it is also true that they are not all interested in western men. But its nice to get to know them. Chinese women are still pure , innocent, shy, romantic, and polite these are all strength that are so lacking in the western culture even if I never get a Chines wife I enjoy their company
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